Padd Solutions

My first memory of man breast was my next door neighbor. We called him King Tut, and he walked around without a shirt regularly. He had these tear-drop tiddies that jiggled subtly every time he walked fast. I just knew a man's chest wasn't supposed to look like that. It hurt my heart and tickled my funny bone - it wasn't right.

However, some of my closest friends are victims of mammary. So, I welcome breast talk with male occupants.

This afternoon I discussed arousal with man breast. Guys just aren't scared to flaunt those meat patties. I thought guys would be discrete or slightly ashamed. Nope. They want you to lick, suck and bite it. Something I could never do, but some of these hos LOVE that shit..I guess. A little part of me would die at the consideration. I rather be competitive. My cup runneth over. So, I am committed to chest slap-boxing with some of my endowed friends.

No hands, elbows, don't touch the face.

http://www.yesterdayland.com/retrotalk/userfiles/manboobs.jpg :|

Were any of you losers sitting at home on New Years Eve like me? Then you probably saw Dick Clark completely fuck up the countdown and create a very awkward moment on national television. Check out the video below...



This is not to make fun of his condition because thats not a laughing matter, but for christ's sake someone tell this guy that it's time to hang it up.

I went to visit a long lost friend from highschool a couple days ago. We talked about a lot of things but of course highschool was a key topic. Now, I hardly remember anything from highschool. It was a part of my life where family shit was going on so I was more concerned with that. A majority of the things he remembered surprised me.

However, not all the lesbians. Girls came out hard between 10th and 11th grade. They'd go from form fitting to loose white tees and New Era fitted caps over the Summer. I was just wondering how they figured out their identity so quickly. It bothered me that they all fit into niches. Where the bisexuals at? Where's the not clearly butch, not clearly feminine checks at? lol It seems like everyone played a role. Not to mention knowing some of the butch girls for a while ...you know their favorite Powerpuff Girl, etc - but they want you to treat them like a man? Heffa your name is Cyrstal.

I respect it though, I generally have no judgment on how people choose to identify themselves. I can find it funny. It is. People take the sexual side of themselves too seriously. Girls would try to lesbian up every aspect of their life. If they could open their locker the lesbian way, they would.

I don't consider myself a writer, but I've always been decent at writing and expressing myself on paper. I'm pretty good with grammar and I'm an excellent speller (not that it matters much in the days of auto spell check), but there's much more to that than writing professionally. Developing ideas, working with editors, opening yourself of to scrutiny from the public, being forced to take a stance and "be seen"... they're all things I've had to learn how to do.

You know what, I'm gonna cut this intro short because it's not what I intended this post to be about. The basic gist of what you have to know is, I'm getting to the point in my "career" where I get to interview famous people and it makes me slightly nervous.

I've been offered various interviews by my superiors sparingly over the last year and a half or so, and up until now I've turned them all down. I've never considered myself a professional, so I just didn't think want to make an ass of myself talking to someone I wasn't a fan of. I figured.... theres no way I could fail at an interview if it happened to be an artist I knew ALOT about.

So anyways, earlier this week my boss asked me to interview Kid Sister, who is an up and coming female rapper out of Chicago, I've heard of her before due to the music video she had with Kanye West a while back but outside of that I'd never listened to any of her stuff. Following with my previously mentioned reasoning.... I turned the interview down, but my boss sorta pushed me and said "aww come on...it's just a 10 minute interview it'll be easy". So I took the plunge... said yes.... and immediately began googling her to find out everything I could dig up.

I can't say I was nervous interviewing her... because I wasn't, I was moreso concerned abotu NOT sounding like an ass, and not asking dumb questions. The phone interview was at 10am, and I was so fucking sleepy... when Kid Sister picked up the phone I could tell she was tired as well... at least she sounded like it.


I won't bore you with the specifics but I did okay ... not good, not great, not horrible... just okay. There were too many "uhhs..and umms...and "likes" on my part, so I definitely need to work on speaking clearly, knowing exactly what im going to say, and how I'm going to phrase it. I also need to work on my skills for asking follow up questions to get the artist to clarify what they mean.

In a way I guess it's good that I got to start with an up and coming artist who isn't one of my all time faves. I can't even imagine how much of an ass I would have made of myself if I were interviewing Snoop Dogg or DJ Quik or Jay-Z or something....


I may or may not be interviewing The Clipse in the near future... i know this is a big step up in terms of artist popularity... but we'll see... I'm definitely gonna try to work on my skills.

I have a love for those 50+

I enjoy their slow and wobbled movement, their glasses, the men's slacks and the women's cute little outfits. I like the loose feel of their skin and the usual 'old person hairstyle,' the dressing for comfort in those funny looking wedge-like shoes.

There's just something timeless to me there. There's not a scale of cute with old people, you're just fucking old. I like that.

I think it began when I learned about crystallized knowledge in a Psychology class (Google it). I was so intrigued by it, that I took the concept further in my mind. I put older people on this pedestal because crystallized knowledge increases as you age. They got all them crystals lol.

Intelligence is one of my weaknesses so it catered to that part of me. Not that I find old people attractive, intelligence is - old people are just like the chosen ones.

AARP is more organized than anyone too. I can't wait until I'm old and I can join that. I'll make up gang colors and write letters to senators signed 'Old and Tired.' I wanna be retired and a certified cat lady with 1 pitbull. If I still have dreads they'd be long as shit too. So exciting.

I never get why people are so afraid of old age, besides the death thing. However, "you only scared to die when you ain't living right, man."

To those afraid of wrinkles... wrinkles can be cute as shit. But I'm artistic and I like stretch marks and chankles as well...obviously not the typical opinion, lol.

To old people, ya'll so great. I love you all who aren't just generally assholes and mean harm. :)